So as 2013 wrapped up, WordPress sent me my site stats for the year. 31,000 page views, not too shabby. Still, by the search terms folks used to find me, I think perhaps I had some unwitting viewers. “Disability porn” and “cripple porn” were both on the list, and methinks my discussion of inspiration porn is not the only thing people were searching out.
This is not the porn you are looking for.
Still, maybe that’s for the best. Maybe it means some of the folks who stumbled along my blog were really new to the ideas I presented, and maybe they gained something from what I had to say. Many SJ bloggers hope for just that–to have their words impact someone privileged, have them question the assumptions they’ve always held, and maybe have them walk away humbled and willing to challenge their privilege. A girl can dream.
But 2013 was a big year for the pessimistic side of social justice, too. There were a lot of comments that never got past screening due to their bigotry, hatred, and threats. It’s hard doing this, sometimes; lots of people hate minorities who speak out about their oppression. I can laugh off a lot, but sometimes the venom is particularly potent, and it makes me question what the point is, in a world that doesn’t want people like me to be seen or heard.
I’m still talking, though, and I have no intention of stopping. My queer, fat, crippled ass is still going to plant itself in the writer’s seat, still going to butt heads with MRAs, still going to talk about everything that’s wonderful and awful about being the woman I am. Because I’ll only really lose this game when I’m silent. And I don’t lose.